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TopFive.com
Where's The Friggin' Beef?

September 25, 1998

~~~ NOTE FROM CHRIS: ~~~
As a real Mickey Mouse computer geek, today's guest moderator, Kevin Freels,
has the opportunity for exploiting 98% of the technology that America doesn't
understand. Other parole requirements include satisfying his hobby as a drummer.
Kevin discovered at an early age that hitting inanimate objects gave him great
pleasure, and his musical education was cultivated mostly by accident.

The Top 12 New Menu Items if Fast Food Chains Merged


    1. Whoppita

    2. McDouble-Trouble Famous Starr

    3. Long John McFlounder

    4. Soylent Green

    5. Jack's-Whopper-in-Wendy's-Box

    6. Hooter's and Haagen-Daz present "The Lewinsky Dairy Treat"

    7. The Colonel's "Special Sauce"

    8. Burger King and Dairy Queen: Together, at last

    9. I Can't Believe It's Not Carcinogenic!

    10. McDonald's and Chick Filet proudly offer you, The "Big Pecker"

    11. Wendy's Pair o'Whoppers

      and the Number 1 New Menu Item if Fast Food Chains Merged...

    12. Biggie Thighs



Our ClubTop5 members get to see the
Runner Up and Honorable Mention items
for today's list, plus much MUCH more.

Join today!






Selected from 100 submissions from 40 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:

  • Paul Paternoster, Los Altos Hills, CA -- 1, 12 (11th #1) Email / Hall of Famer
  • Jason Anderson, Birmingham, AL -- 2 Email
  • Peter Bauer, Rochester, NY -- 2
  • Michael Wolf, Brookline, MA -- 2
  • Dave Henry, Slidell, LA -- 2, 8 Email
  • Ed Smith, Chattanooga, TN -- 3, 7
  • Kim Moser, New York, NY -- 4, Runner Up list name Email
  • Jason Anthoine, Alpharetta, GA -- 5
  • Marshal Perlman, Minneapolis, MN -- 6, Topic Email / Website
  • Dave Wesley, Pleasant Hill, CA -- 8 Email
  • Greg Pettit, Houston, TX -- 9 Email
  • David Hyatt, New York, NY -- 10 Email / Website
  • Larry G. Hollister, Concord, CA -- 11, Banner Tag Email / Website
  • Tristan Fabriani, Passaic, NJ -- Banner Tag
  • Jack Mack and the Heart Attack, Los Angeles, CA -- Ambience

Top5 Bomb
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