The Top 5 Differences If America Were Still Under British Rule

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July 2, 2004

~~~ NOTE FROM CHRIS: ~~~

We have a special Fourth of July weekend treat
for you today: The Listolutionary War!
One topic seen from two distinct points of view.

First up: Our USA ClubTop5 moderator, David Zechiel.
David lives in Orange County, California with
his wife and two teenage sons. Or so he says.

The Top 5 Differences If America
Were Still Under British Rule
(USA version)

No hard "R" in Viceroy Bush's pronunciation of "nuculah."
Without guns, urban gangs would engage in drive-by snubbings.
The Cubs would still find a way to break your heart, but it would be in cricket.
Box of ribbed erasers in every nightstand drawer.
and the Number 1 Difference If America Were Still Under British Rule...
Cockneybonics.

Selected from 138 submissions from 49 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:

Colleen Stelmaszek, Houston, TX -- 1 (7th #1)
M.J. Finan, Cleveland, OH -- 2
Steve Hurd, Oakland, CA -- 3 Hall of Famer
Martin Bredeck, Hybla Valley, VA -- 4
Larry Hollister, Concord, CA -- 5, RU list name Website / Hall of Famer
David Zechiel, Lake Forest, CA -- List moderator
Andrew Hackard, Austin, TX -- Topic
Tristan Fabriani, Passaic, NJ -- Banner Tag
Brad Simanek, Cedar Rapids, IA -- HM list name Website
Chris White, Los Angeles, CA -- List owner/editor Email / Hall of Famer
Gene Loves Jezebel, Porthcawl, South Wales -- Ambience (explanation)

Next up: Our UK ClubTop5 moderator, Sara Batts.
Brit Sara lives in London, drinks tea and loves
Marmite on toast. She's been reading the Top 5 List
for years, greatly enhancing her cross-cultural
understanding of US humour. Or something.

The Top 5 Differences If America
Were Still Under British Rule
(UK version)

How tough can a rapper be with a name like "50p"?
We'd all be speaking English.
We'd still be fat and arrogant -- we'd just sound smarter.
Everyone would spell "colour" and "cheque" correctly.
and the Number 1 Difference If America Were Still Under British Rule...

Without guns, urban gangs would engage in drive-by snubbings.

Selected from 138 submissions from 49 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:

Martin Bredeck, Hybla Valley, VA -- 1 (8th #1)
Ian Dauphinee, Calgary, AB, Canada -- 2
Curtis Stoddard, Milwaukie, OR -- 3
Bill Muse, Seattle, WA -- 4 Hall of Famer
Sandra Hull, Arlington, VA -- 5 Website / Hall of Famer
Sara Batts, London, England -- List moderator
Andrew Hackard, Austin, TX -- Topic
Donald Junter, New Haven, CT -- Banner Tag
Carl Knorr, Devo City, OH -- Runner Up list name
Larry Hollister, Concord, CA -- HM list name Website / Hall of Famer
Chris White, Los Angeles, CA -- List owner/editor Email / Hall of Famer
The Sensational Alex Harvey Band, Glasgow, Scotland -- Ambience (explanation)

Our ClubTop5 members get to see the entire 13-item list!




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