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September 8, 1999




The Top 5 Bad Romance Novel Metaphors or Similes


    1. He Beatty-ed her shamelessly, making her squeal like Ned and hallucinate like Warren.

    2. He awoke my slumbering womanhood with his double tall loin latte. "Starbuck!" I cried.

    3. His chest was her pillow, and oh, did she drool.

    4. Claire felt swept away by this dark stranger, a helpless dust bunny in the roaring cacophony of his gas-powered leaf blower.

      and the Number 1 Bad Romance Novel Metaphor or Simile...

    5. His finger, weathered and rough from years on the ranch, danced in and out of his nose like a slimy ballerina.





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Selected from 92 submissions from 33 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:

  • Hank Weilevy, Fairless Hills, PA -- 1 (18th #1)
  • Larry G. Hollister, Concord, CA -- 2, RU list name
  • Joe DiPietro, Brooklyn, NY -- 3
  • Bill Muse, Seattle, WA -- 4
  • David Kass, Brooklyn, NY -- 5
  • Larry Baum, Hong Kong -- Topic
  • Julie Schlosbon, whereabouts unknown -- Banner Tag
  • Lev L. Spiro, Los Angeles, CA -- HM list name
  • Chris White, New York, NY -- List owner/editor
  • Everything But the Girl, Hull, England -- Ambience

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