The Top 5 Things to Do Before You Die

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Fashioned from the rehydrated remains of ancient humorworms.

September 12, 2005

The Top 5 Things to Do Before You Die

Buy that poor Lindsay Lohan a sandwich.
Jump the Snake River Canyon in the Oscar Meyer Wienermobile, landing in a giant bun on the far side in a blaze of mustard-and-relish-splashed glory.
Swim with the dolphins. Better yet, hot tub with the Dolphins' cheerleaders.
Send away for a mail-order bride and move while she's in transit. Keep one jump ahead of her for 12 years and then refuse delivery because she doesn't look like her ad.
and the Number 1 Thing to Do Before You Die...
Go back in time and convince Subway's Jared Fogle to try the Krispy Kreme diet instead.

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Selected from 152 submissions from 38 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:

Marshal Perlman, Irvine, CA -- 1 (6th #1) Website
John J. Brassil, Nashville, TN -- 2
Carl Knorr, Devo City, OH -- 3 Hall of Famer
Sandra Hull, Arlington, VA -- 4 Website / Hall of Famer
Christa Grunewald, Wamego, KS -- 5
Andrea Bempensante, Milano, Italia -- Topic
Tristan Fabriani, Passaic, NJ -- Banner Tag
Chris White, Los Angeles, CA -- List owner/editor Hall of Famer
June Carter and Johnny Cash -- Ambience (explanation)




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