January 14, 2002
~~~ NOTE FROM CHRIS: ~~~
Hello, TopFiveDom! We are officially back
from our annual break, wearing our felt
cowboy hats and riding our stick horses.
We hope that you're all having a great 2002 so far.
We're going to have some VERY big news on Wednesday
regarding the future of TopFive, so stay tuned.
The Top 15 TopFive.com Predictions for 2002
- On Fox TV's "COPS," a handcuffed, drunken Osama bin Laden is dragged from a Pakistani trailer home in his underwear.
- After its hostile takeovers of Microsoft, AT&T, and AOL/Time Warner, TopFive.com becomes the world's most feared corporation.
- Gary Condit wins re-election after all his opponents magically disappear on their way home.
- Britney's nipple appears, see its own shadow, and hides again until 2003.
- Someone in your neighborhood will actually buy one of those newfangled Segway scooters. This person will not have sex. Ever.
- Despite controversial finish, Taliban bobsled team takes the Olympic bronze medal.
- Out of touch with the public, Mariah Carey absolutely, unequivocally refuses to go away.
- Jim Carrey, snubbed yet again by the Oscars, goes on a mad shooting spree -- which critics dismiss as "insipid, rubber-faced antics."
- TopFive on Ice!
- Miss Cleo is called in after the Secret Service forgets where they put Dick Cheney.
- Richard Simmons finally returns to his home planet.
- George W. Bush loses Hawaii in a crooked poker game, but Tom Bosley wins it back for him.
- Al Gore? Still not President.
- "Star Wars, Episode II: Jar-Jar's Gory Demise" shatters box office records.
and the Number 1 TopFive.com Prediction for 2002...
- Inspired by the example of Jimmy Carter, Bill Clinton begins using the prestige of his former office to bring about international understanding and cooperation, starting with the topless beaches of the French Riviera.
Join ClubTop5 and check out the Runners Up submissions for this list!
Selected from 145 submissions from 52 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:
- Larry Hollister, Concord, CA -- 1 (44th #1) Email / Website / Hall of Famer
- Peter Rogers, Austin, TX -- 2, 8, Topic
- Barbara McMahon, Ann Arbor, MI -- 3 Email
- Mark Niebuhr, Minneapolis, MN -- 4 Website
- Fran Fruit, Winnetka, IL -- 5, 6
- Rick Welshans, Alexandria, VA -- 5 Email
- Slick Sharkey, Miami, FL -- 6 Hall of Famer
- Whit Watson, West Hartford, CT -- 7
- Brad Osberg, Calgary, Canada -- 9
- Wade Kwon, Birmingham, AL -- 10 Email / Website / Hall of Famer
- Greg Preece, Toronto, Canada -- 11
- Peter Casper, Brisbane, Australia -- 12
- Matt Moore, Fresno, CA -- 13 Email
- Kim Moser, New York, NY -- 14 Email / Hall of Famer
- Chuck Sawyer, Rochester, NY -- 15
- Tristan Fabriani, Passaic, NJ -- Banner Tag Email
- Sandra Hull, Arlington, VA -- RU list name Email / Website / Hall of Famer
- Bill Muse, Seattle, WA -- HM list name Email / Hall of Famer
- Chris White, Los Angeles, CA -- List owner/editor Email / Hall of Famer
- Lou Reed, Long Island, NY -- Ambience (explanation)
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