TopFive
  Index
  About Us

  Previous Lists
  Greatest Hits
  Hall of Fame

  You Really Like Us!

  Store    Privacy
  Links!   Contact

Top 5 List RSS feed
What' s this?

Members Only
  ClubTop5
Subscribe

  Top5/ClubTop5

  Little Fivers

Sponsored Links

Natural remedies
for people & pets


Long Lost Friends:
Used/Rare Books


The Bible Online

This site hosted by Dreamhost.com


TopFive.com
The Internet's longest-lasting, freshest-tasting humor list!
January 29, 2002


The Top 15 Signs You're in Desperate Need of Adult Supervision


    1. Last weekend, you and your buddies TP'd a house. The White House.

    2. Your pile of dirty laundry is higher than your tower of beer cans.

    3. In a fit of gourmet creativity, you come up with a recipe that combines pink and blue margarine, green and purple ketchup, and Cap'n Crunch.

    4. You foolishly trade your cube-mate two Charmanders for three Jigglypuffs.

    5. You're a single male, aged 25-40, making between $35K and $50K annually, with 75% of your 401(k) in low-yield short-term bonds and the rest in tax-exempt municipals. And your pants are on fire.

    6. Uncontrollable shouts of "Wheeeeeeeeeeee!!!!" every time you take the elevator down two floors to the cafeteria.

    7. When you move, you lose your entire security deposit because the landlord had to paint over your crayoned mural of Sesame Street characters "doing it."

    8. They leave you alone for just 5 minutes, and you start shredding Enron documents.

    9. You decide to spend 3 months waiting in line for the next "Star Wars" episode after your mom agrees to keep you supplied with Mountain Dew and Mentos.

    10. Despite the Ivy League law degree, you were once impeached by the House.

    11. A full 30 years after your kindergarten teacher told you to, you still refuse to share the Flintstones Fone with the other kids.

    12. Dunking cookies in the corporate cafeteria is okay, but the "Help! I'm drowning!!" sound effects?

    13. First he catches you using your boogers as paste, then he walks in while you're playing "Godzilla eats bin Laden" with your sock puppets -- can't Cheney bug someone else for a while?!?

    14. Your three square meals a day? Nothin' but Pop-Tarts, Baby!

      and the Number 1 Sign You're in Desperate Need of Adult Supervision...

    15. The producers of "Jackass" are too freaked out to look at any more of your audition tapes.

Join ClubTop5 and check out the Runners Up submissions for this list!




Selected from 101 submissions from 40 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:


  • Sandra Hull, Arlington, VA -- 1 (17th #1) Email / Website / Hall of Famer
  • Daniel Weckerly, Limerick, PA -- 1 (16th #1) Email / Hall of Famer
  • Andy Ihnatko, Boston, MA -- 1 (8th #1)
  • Geoff Brown, Ann Arbor, MI -- 2 Email / Website / Hall of Famer
  • Peter Bauer, Rochester, NY -- 3, 15 Hall of Famer
  • Larry Hollister, Concord, CA -- 3, HM list name Email / Website / Hall of Famer
  • Peter Casper, Brisbane, Australia -- 4
  • Bryce Daigle, Cornwall, Canada -- 5
  • Paul Schindler, Orinda, CA -- 6 Email / Website
  • Tristan Fabriani, Passaic, NJ -- 7 Email
  • Slick Sharkey, Miami, FL -- 8 Hall of Famer
  • Andrea Crain, Madison, WI -- 9 Website
  • Chris Gleason, Gaithersburg, MD -- 10
  • Joseph Moore, Concord, CA -- 11 Email
  • David Hyatt, New York, NY -- 12 Email / Website
  • Mark Niebuhr, Minneapolis, MN -- 12 Website
  • Fran Fruit, Winnetka, IL -- 13, 14
  • Julie K. Stahlhut, Kalamazoo, MI -- Topic
  • George Robinson, whereabouts unknown -- Banner Tag
  • Kevin Freels, Walnut Creek, CA -- RU list name Email / Website / Hall of Famer
  • Chris White, Los Angeles, CA -- List owner/editor Email / Hall of Famer
  • The Ramones, New York, NY -- Ambience   (explanation)

Top5 Bomb

© Copyright 1994-2008.  All rights reserved.
TopFive.com and The Top 5 List are owned by Chris White.
Absolutely no publishing or reprinting without prior consent.