February 8, 2001
The Top 14 Least-Known Psychological Afflictions
- Elevitis: The compulsive need to press already-lit elevator buttons.
- Shoshanism: Persistent, pathological fascination with persons of no discernible accomplishment beyond their former association with celebrities. (See also Katotonia, Monicanucleosis)
- Schlitzophrenia: The inexplicable desire to consume cheap domestic beer.
- Munchies-Syndrome-By-Proxy: A craving for salty snack foods, often triggered by the pot smoking of others.
- Fallonian Denial: Recurring belief that maybe, just maybe, this week's "Saturday Night Live" won't suck.
- Bull-imia: Self-destructive cycle of bingeing on blue chips, then purging stocks at market close.
- Chadophobia: Irrational fear you might suddenly punch a passing Floridian.
- Dietrrhea: The inability to be on any weight-loss program without talking about it to everyone in the tri-state area.
- Dubyalusions of Grandeur: Mistaken belief that you actually won the election.
- Adolescinemaphilia: Uncontrollable urge to see a Freddie Prinze, Jr. movie.
- Probst-Traumatic Stress Disorder: Fear of being voted out of the tribe.
- White's Syndrome: The inability to compile a list that conforms with pre-determined numerical criteria.
- Bipolarbear Disorder: Desire to have sex with large arctic carnivores of either gender.
and the Number 1 Least-Known Psychological Affliction...
- Barcolepsy: The inability to remain awake for longer than 30 seconds after sitting in the recliner in front of the TV.
Join ClubTop5 and check out the Runners Up submissions for this list!
Selected from 75 submissions from 41 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:
- Daniel Weckerly, Limerick, PA -- 1 (13th #1)
- Joseph Moore, Concord, CA -- 2 Email
- Dave Goudsward, Harrisburg, PA -- 3 Email
- Wade Kwon, Birmingham, AL -- 4, 9 Email / Website
- Lev L. Spiro, Los Angeles, CA -- 5, 8, RU list name Email / Hall of Famer
- Lloyd Jacobson, Washington, DC -- 6 Hall of Famer
- Jennifer Ford, Fort Wayne, IN -- 7 Email / Website
- Peter Rogers, Austin, TX -- 10
- Ann Bartow, Bartow, FL -- 11
- Jeffrey Anbinder, New York, NY -- 12 Email / Website
- Fran Fruit, Winnetka, IL -- 13
- Spike Jones, Atlanta, GA -- 14
- Mark Niebuhr, Minneapolis, MN -- Topic Website
- Dave Henry, Slidell, LA -- Banner Tag Email
- Sandra Hull, Arlington, VA -- Honorable Mention list name Email / Website
- Jeffrey Anbinder, New York, NY -- List moderator
- Chris White, Irvine, CA -- List owner/editor Email / Hall of Famer
- The Ramones, New York, NY -- Ambience (explanation)
|
