14. "You were, uh, *born* a man, right?"

13. "Are you going to tell me the secret code, or am I going to have to assume you're an alien and blast you?"

12. "You and your wife were never very big on that 'exclusive' thing, right?"

11. "Where were you on the night Ms. Tripp was impregnated?"

10. "Can you help me carry this across the street? It's not very infected, just a little slippery."

9. "...and do you take this man, Orenthal James Simpson, to be your lawfully-wedded husband?"

8. "Daddy, can you tell if this pus is coming from my labia tattoo or my labia piercing?"

7. "Well, if that's not your prostate, what is it?"

6. "When did you decide to invest all your lottery winnings in Pets.com?"

5. "What made you think I was a doctor?"

4. "Weren't you wearing a condom earlier?"

3. "So, boss... does your coffee taste funny this morning?"

2. "Mr. Secretary, did the President tell the Chinese Ambassador we are maintaining a 'preventory' nuclear presence in the China Sea or a 'pre-emptory' nuclear presence?"

   and the Number 1 Question You'd Rather Not Be Asked...

1. "Blindfold?"

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