June 25, 2001
~~~ NOTE FROM CHRIS: ~~~
Recently it was reported that in the United States,
McDonald's has been cooking their French fries in
beef fat at their processing plants before freezing
them and shipping them to the restaurants, where
they're fried again, this time in vegetable oil.
As you might imagine, American Hindus and vegetarians
are pretty upset about this. Kind of makes you wonder
just what *else* McDonald's might be hiding, doesn't it?
The Top 16 Other Things McDonald's Hasn't Told You
- The shakes? Also fried in beef fat.
- Tell the vegetarians to brace themselves; we have some bad news about the salads.
- Want to avoid beef fat altogether? Try our hamburgers.
- Mayor McCheese has had five coronary bypass surgeries.
- Burgers that don't sell after two days spend the rest of the month as "Filet-O-Fish."
- The Hamburglar MUST dress like that because of Megan's Law.
- McNuggets are shaped to honor the states with lenient meat-handling laws.
- The reason we wear rubber gloves is for OUR protection, not yours.
- The real Ronald McDonald died in 1969, trying to wrestle the controls of a small plane from an inebriated Hamburglar.
- We never asked; we just assumed you'd prefer it lukewarm.
- The Bible might be a series of allegorically instructive fables, rather than historically factual accounts.
- You can McNugget almost anything and people still think it's chicken.
- If our lawsuit succeeds, many Irish people will lose the first two letters of their surname, as did Hammer.
- We modeled Ronald on a painting by John Wayne Gacy.
- Actually, seeing you smile kind of creeps us out.
and the Number 1 Other Thing McDonald's Hasn't Told You...
- "Okay, you got us; there aren't really any salads back here."
Join ClubTop5 and check out the Runners Up submissions for this list!
Selected from 176 submissions from 65 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:
- Joe DiPietro, Brooklyn, NY -- 1 (2nd #1) Email / Website
- Jeffrey Anbinder, New York, NY -- 2, Topic Email / Website
- Peter Bauer, Rochester, NY -- 3
- J. Hutter, San Francisco, CA -- 4
- Andy Ihnatko, Boston, MA -- 5, 12
- Lev L. Spiro, Los Angeles, CA -- 6, 8, Banner Tag Email / Hall of Famer
- Paul Schindler, Orinda, CA -- 7 Email / Website
- Kim Moser, New York, NY -- 9 Email
- Martin Bredeck, Hybla Valley, VA -- 10
- Dan Johnson, Champlin, MN -- 11 Website
- Bill Muse, Seattle, WA -- 13, RU list name Email / Hall of Famer
- Fran Fruit, Winnetka, IL -- 14
- Dave Goudsward, Harrisburg, PA -- 14 Email
- Ed Smith, Chattanooga, TN -- 14 Hall of Famer
- John Voigt, Chicago, IL -- 14 Hall of Famer
- Michael Wolf, Brookline, MA -- 14
- Tristan Fabriani, Passaic, NJ -- 14 Email
- Jennifer Ford, Fort Wayne, IN -- 15 Email / Website
- Sandra Hull, Arlington, VA -- 16, Honorable Mention list name Email / Website
- Bill Muse, Seattle, WA -- List moderator
- Chris White, Los Angeles, CA -- List owner/editor Email / Hall of Famer
- ZZ Top, Houston, TX -- Ambience (explanation)
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