Now tobacco-free!
June 28, 1999
~~~ NOTE FROM CHRIS: ~~~
Today's list is a Top5 Classic,
originally published on June 17, 1996.
The Top 20 Cool Things About a Car that
Goes Faster than the Speed of Light
- Sleep 'til noon. Still get to work by 8:00am!
- Doppler shift makes red traffic lights look green.
- Breaking laws of physics only a misdemeanor in most states.
- Never in car long enough to hear an entire Madonna song.
- Carl Sagan and Stephen Hawking keep bugging you to carpool.
- No one can see you pick your nose while you drive.
- Lunch breaks in Paris, circa 1792.
- LA to Vegas in 2 nanoseconds.
- You can stop worrying about being sucked into a black hole driving home from work.
- You'll be so thin while driving it you can even wear horizontal stripes.
- That deer in your headlights is actually behind you.
- Kid from Mentos commercial almost guaranteed to lose a limb if he tries to duck through back seat.
- Traffic enforcement limited to cops with PhD's in Quantum Physics.
- Bugs never see you comin'.
- You can get to the good hookers before Charlie Sheen.
- Can make a fortune delivering pizza with the slogan "It's there before you order or it's free!"
- Car makes it from Hollywood to London fast enough to not arouse suspicions of Elizabeth Hurley.
- License plate: "Me=mc2"
- Cigarette butts don't land in the backseat -- they land in last week!
and the Number 1 Cool Thing About a Car that Goes Faster than the Speed of Light...
- Chicks dig it.
There are no Runner Up submissions for this list!
Selected from 137 submissions from 53 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:
- Lev L. Spiro, Los Angeles, CA -- 1, 13
- Sterling Smith, Houston, TX -- 1, 20
- John Voigt, Chicago, IL -- 2
- Wade Kwon, Birmingham, AL -- 3
- Scott Woolley, Cambridge MA -- 4, 18 (Rookie!)
- Steve Hurd, San Ramon, CA -- 5, 8
- Paul Paternoster, Redwood City, CA -- 5, 19, 20 (Rookie!)
- David Gunter, Auburn -- 5, Topic (Rookie!)
- David Hyatt, New York, NY -- 6, 15
- Jay Allen, Santa Barbara, CA -- 7
- Meredith Ogden, Ithaca, NY -- 9
- Doug Johnson, Santa Cruz, CA -- 10
- Paul Schindler, Orinda, CA -- 11
- Mike Manion, Lexington, KY -- 12
- Joe Desiderio, New York, NY -- 14
- Jennifer Hart, Arlington, VA -- 16
- Dave George, Arlington, VA -- 17
- Randy Wohl, Ma'ale Adumim, Israel -- 19
- Pete Brittingham, Titusville, NJ -- 19
- Kermit Woodall, Richmond, VA -- 20
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