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I, TopFive, do solemnly swear...
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August 27, 2003
~~~ NOTE FROM CHRIS: ~~~
Continuing with our special California recall election week,
in which we choose two or three candidates each day and help
them come up with attention-getting campaign slogans.
Today's targets are both, er, ladies:
Angelyne, the top-heavy, sunglass-wearing,
pink-Corvette-driving Los Angeles billboard queen.
Mary Carey, the porn star who wants to install
live web cams in every room of the Governor's Mansion.
The Top 10 Angelyne Campaign Slogans
- I'll Raise Something Other Than Your Taxes
- Bringing the Silicone to Silicon Valley
- Can Anyone Possibly Be More Vapid Than Gray Davis? YES!
- TWICE the Boob Your One Vote Usually Gets You
- Let's Get California Back in the Pink (Corvette, That Is)
- Don't Think, Just Vote for Me! Hurry Up! Six Feet Under Is On in Twenty Minutes!
- If I Can Balance These Puppies, I Can Balance the Budget
- I'm NOTHING Like That Publicity-Whore, Mary Carey
- Bigger Breasts Than Any Candidate Except Arnold
and the Number 1 Angelyne Campaign Slogan...
- The Governor's Mansion Needs a New Set of Knockers
The Top 10 Mary Carey Slogans
- For Once, Let the People Screw the Governor
- Well-Prepared to Handle Those Pricks in the State Senate
- I Challenge 100-Year-Old Candidate Mathilda Spak to a Topless Debate -- Any Time, Anywhere!
- Now You Can Chuckle Knowingly When Someone Says the Governor Sucks
- Dying to Get in Bed With Special Interest Groups... and Film It!
- I'll Provide 'Jobs for the Entire State
- Free Trial Campaign Speeches -- No Credit Card Needed!
- I'm NOTHING Like That Publicity-Whore, Angelyne
- Ohmygod, Your Ballot Is So Big! I Couldn't Possibly... Oh... Oh! My! God! Yes! Vote Me, Baby! Vote Me Hard!
and the Number 1 Mary Carey Campaign Slogan...
- A Lickin' in Every Spot
Join ClubTop5 to check out the
runner up submissions for this list.
Selected from 85 submissions from 46 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:
- Angelyne list:
- Pam Wylder, Bloomington, IL -- 1 (2nd #1)
- Tristan Fabriani, Passaic, NJ -- 2
- Mitch Berg, Saint Paul, MN -- 3 Email / Website
- Bill Muse, Seattle, WA -- 4 Email / Hall of Famer
- Brad Simanek, Cedar Rapids, IA -- 5
- Donald Junter, New Haven, CT -- 6, 8
- Anne Sholl, Trenton, NJ -- 7
- Mike Levy, Los Angeles, CA -- 9
- Bob Mader, Knoxville, TN -- 9
- Danny Gallagher, Austin, TX -- 10 Email
- Dave Goudsward, Lake Worth, FL -- 10 Email
- Mary Carey list:
- Anne Sholl, Trenton, NJ -- 1 (Woohoo! 1st #1!)
- Mark Schmidt, Paris, France -- 2 Email / Hall of Famer
- Mitch Berg, Saint Paul, MN -- 3 Email / Website
- Bill Muse, Seattle, WA -- 4, 10 Email / Hall of Famer
- Curt Cutting, Santa Monica, CA -- 5
- Dave Wesley, Pleasant Hill, CA -- 5 Email / Hall of Famer
- Andy Krakowski, Alexandria, VA -- 6, 7
- Carl Knorr, Devo City, OH -- 6, 9
- Donald Junter, New Haven, CT -- 7
- Tom Stoudt, Fort Washington, PA -- 8
- Larry Hollister, Concord, CA -- 10 Email / Website / Hall of Famer
- Tristan Fabriani, Passaic, NJ -- Topic, Banner Tag, RU names Email
- Chris White, Los Angeles, CA -- List owner/editor Email / Hall of Famer
- Nomeansno, Victoria, BC, Canada -- Ambience (explanation)
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TopFive.com and The Top 5 List are owned by Chris White.
Absolutely no publishing or reprinting without prior consent.
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