14. "And I would like to begin the annual Thanksgiving Toast, Mr. President, by recounting the words of one of my favorite Jewish Country and Western songs..."

13. "Mr. President, you're drinking the gravy again."

12. "And now for the stuffing... hey! Who put a cigar in there?!? This is NOT funny!!"

11. "I'll be back in a minute, Honey. I'm just going to offer the intern some stuffing."

10. "Roasted turkey!? Dammit, is the deep fryer broken again?"

9. "Man! Who are those hot young babes who came in with Gore and his wife?"

8. "Oh, come on, Al -- you did *not* invent Thanksgiving."

7. "God, I'd be thankful if HE were de-boned."

6. "I did not have seconds of that dish... mashed potatoes."

5. "Pssst... Monica, we don't kneel to say grace."

4. "God is great, God is good. Oh, darn the luck, I've sprouted wood."

3. "It would not be an unforeseen event for the dryness quotient of my slain meat product to be so elevated at to suggest artificial moistening as a direction in which we may eventually want to move..."
   "Would someone just pass Greenspan the friggin' gravy already?!?"

2. "I'm sorry, Mr. Starr, no one here knows the Heimlich maneuver."

   and the Number 1 Thing Overheard at the White House Thanksgiving Dinner...

1. "Pay attention, Bill: Here's a little carving trick I learned from Lorena Bobbitt."

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