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TopFive's Funny Valentines for 2003
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Page 1 | Page 2 | Page 3 | Page 4
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To Know Him is to Love Him,
True Love Leaves No Trace.
But when You've Lost
That Lovin' Feelin',
I'll shoot you in the face.
(Joseph Moore)
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Of all your sexy girlie parts,
From your toes
Up to your septum,
I guess I like
Your panties best --
I'm sorry that I stretched 'em.
(Greg Preece)
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"L" is for liar,
Which you seem to be.
"O" is for over,
Your engagement to me.
"V" is for vengeance,
And pain that will sting.
"E" is for eBay,
Where you'll find that ring.
(Andy Krakowski)
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This SUV's yours
With best wishes, of course.
You'll traverse right through
Mud, snow or dirt.
And though it's enormous,
I bought it so that
I could see you
Climb up in that skirt.
(John Treusch)
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Our blind date was sucky:
I'm cheap and a bore,
My breath smelled like livestock.
I stared at the floor,
But remember one thing
As I ask to come in:
If you should deny me,The terrorists win!
(Brad Simanek)
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I'd like to
Snuggle up with you,
Share feelings,
Heart-to-heart.
But every time
I move in close,
You cut loose
With a fart.
(Doug Finney)
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Sweetheart,
I so truly love
Your mind and
Soul and beauty.
And damn, girl,
I can't wait till I
Get all up
In that booty!
(Carl Knorr)
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I'm a gorgeous young
Single-white-female,
You're 'bout 90, no teeth
And no hair.
Since you're wealthy,
Let's head for the bedroom.
Just don't pull
A Joe Millionaire.
(Larry Hollister)
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TopFive.com and The Top 5 List are owned by Chris White.
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