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TopFive's Valentine's Cards for Ex-Valentines Page 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 You picked me up at Woodstock, from thousands of guys who were there. How ironic, then, you'd find true love, when we went to Lilith Fair. (Andrew Thomas) Roses are red, emeralds are greener I got remarried -- neener, neener, neener! (Sandra Hull) Our love was true, or so I thought, but there was just one hitch: Instead of kind and lovable, turns out you're quite a bitch. (Doug Finney) You won't take my calls, you call me a toady. Guess I'll have to impress you, like I impressed Jody. (Bruce Ansley) Your champagne was acid, your chocolates were greasy. Your roses were flaccid, and you made me queasy. Any questions? (Ann Barton) Roses are red, violets are blue. You got my house, but you got my clap, too! (David Bryant) Please take me back, our love was da bomb! Can't you just forget that I slept with your Mom? (Jonathan Colan) 'Tis better to have loved and lost, this painful truth I know. And therefore do I give thee thanks, thou two-faced freakin' ho. (Larry Hollister) © Copyright 1994-2010.  All rights reserved. TopFive.com and The Top 5 List are owned by Chris White. Absolutely no publishing or reprinting without prior consent.