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December 6, 2007
~~~ NOTE FROM CHRIS: ~~~
Yesterday we looked at the Hollywood writers strike.
Today we're going to turn our focus to
an even-less-appreciated group of scribes.
The Top 15 Demands of Striking TopFive Writers
- A cushier bench and lighter barbell for the bench press in the writers' gym.
- Occasional natural light, please? Is that *really* too much to freakin' ask for?
- Shave another 1/4 inch off the bottom of the cell doors. The new PopTarts don't fit.
- New friends and family to replace the ones driven away by incessant "sharing" of rejected entries.
- A higher funny-attractive-women-to middle-aged-overweight-bearded-men ratio in the writing staff.
- Stop buying the cafeteria's lunchmeat from Korea.
- An occasional courtesy flush would be nice.
- Health plan options that involve real doctors and real medicine. There's only so much "Nana White's Cream of Gin Soup" a guy can take.
- Access to the company Yugo.
- Hurricane Name list residuals.
- Free Chester!
- Less Tabasco on the tip of the cattle prod.
- New toothbrushes for scrubbing the bathroom floors in stately White Manor.
- While the "thank you's" and pats on the back are nice, a little reach-around once in a while wouldn't hurt.
and the Number 1 Demand of Striking TopFive Writers...
- A contract put out on Bill Muse so some of the rest of us could get a #1 now and again.
Our ClubTop5 members get to see the
Runner Up and Honorable Mention items
for today's list, plus much MUCH more.
Join today!
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Selected from 116 submissions from 41 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:
- Dawson Rambo, Santa Rosa, CA -- 1 (8th #1)
- Spike Jones, Atlanta, GA -- 2
- Dave Goudsward, Lake Worth, FL -- 3
- Richard Skora, Columbus, OH -- 4, 10
- David Kass, Queens, NY -- 5 Hall of Famer
- Larry Hollister, Concord, CA -- 6 Hall of Famer
- Kevin Wickart, Normal, IL -- 7, 8, 11 (Hat trick!) Website
- Curtis Stoddard, Cedar Hills, UT -- 9
- Bruce W. Alter, Fairfax Station, VA -- 12
- Nathan C. Sherman, Bellevue, WA -- 13
- L. A. Bettencourtt, Macon, GA -- 14
- Tom Stoudt, Fort Washington, PA -- 14 Hall of Famer
- Brian Daywalt, Wabash, IN -- 15
- Tristan Fabriani, Passaic, NJ -- Banner Tag
- Dan Weckerly, Limerick, PA -- List moderator
- Chris White, Los Angeles, CA -- List owner/editor Hall of Famer
- Aretha Franklin, Memphis, TN -- Ambience (explanation)
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© Copyright 1994-2008. All rights reserved.
TopFive.com and The Top 5 List are owned by Chris White.
Absolutely no publishing or reprinting without prior consent.
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