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TopFive.com
Please help keep the list area clean.
December 6, 2007


~~~ NOTE FROM CHRIS: ~~~

Yesterday we looked at the Hollywood writers strike.
Today we're going to turn our focus to
an even-less-appreciated group of scribes.


The Top 15 Demands of Striking TopFive Writers


  1. A cushier bench and lighter barbell for the bench press in the writers' gym.

  2. Occasional natural light, please? Is that *really* too much to freakin' ask for?

  3. Shave another 1/4 inch off the bottom of the cell doors. The new PopTarts don't fit.

  4. New friends and family to replace the ones driven away by incessant "sharing" of rejected entries.

  5. A higher funny-attractive-women-to middle-aged-overweight-bearded-men ratio in the writing staff.

  6. Stop buying the cafeteria's lunchmeat from Korea.

  7. An occasional courtesy flush would be nice.

  8. Health plan options that involve real doctors and real medicine. There's only so much "Nana White's Cream of Gin Soup" a guy can take.

  9. Access to the company Yugo.

  10. Hurricane Name list residuals.

  11. Free Chester!

  12. Less Tabasco on the tip of the cattle prod.

  13. New toothbrushes for scrubbing the bathroom floors in stately White Manor.

  14. While the "thank you's" and pats on the back are nice, a little reach-around once in a while wouldn't hurt.

    and the Number 1 Demand of Striking TopFive Writers...

  15. A contract put out on Bill Muse so some of the rest of us could get a #1 now and again.



Our ClubTop5 members get to see the
Runner Up and Honorable Mention items
for today's list, plus much MUCH more.

Join today!




Selected from 116 submissions from 41 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:


  • Dawson Rambo, Santa Rosa, CA -- 1 (8th #1)
  • Spike Jones, Atlanta, GA -- 2
  • Dave Goudsward, Lake Worth, FL -- 3
  • Richard Skora, Columbus, OH -- 4, 10
  • David Kass, Queens, NY -- 5 Hall of Famer
  • Larry Hollister, Concord, CA -- 6 Hall of Famer
  • Kevin Wickart, Normal, IL -- 7, 8, 11 (Hat trick!) Website
  • Curtis Stoddard, Cedar Hills, UT -- 9
  • Bruce W. Alter, Fairfax Station, VA -- 12
  • Nathan C. Sherman, Bellevue, WA -- 13
  • L. A. Bettencourtt, Macon, GA -- 14
  • Tom Stoudt, Fort Washington, PA -- 14 Hall of Famer
  • Brian Daywalt, Wabash, IN -- 15
  • Tristan Fabriani, Passaic, NJ -- Banner Tag
  • Dan Weckerly, Limerick, PA -- List moderator
  • Chris White, Los Angeles, CA -- List owner/editor Hall of Famer
  • Aretha Franklin, Memphis, TN -- Ambience   (explanation)

Top5 Bomb

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