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This Sunday night at the Viper Room!
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March 12, 2008
~~~ NOTE FROM CHRIS: ~~~
In case you hadn't heard, Fidel Castro *finally* stepped
down after 126 years as Cuba's prime minister and president.
The Top 16 Fidel Castro Retirement Plans
- Goodbye, drab green army fatigues; Hello, cargo shorts and Hawaiian shirt!
- Apply for a job as a greeter at the Havana Wal-Mart.
- Track down and kill the jerk who put his picture on Zig Zag rolling papers without permission!
- Stage a revolution at the International House of Pancakes.
- "I'm going to Cigar World!"
- Scrapbooking. After all, there are so many great torture pictures to organize!
- Finally put some time and effort into that MySpace page.
- Open a bed and breakfast on Cape Cod with longtime companion, Hugo Chavez.
- Track down the real killers of Che Guevara.
- Take a test drive in that Revolution Red 1958 Bel Air he's had his eye on.
- Catalog flora and fauna growing in beard.
- Take over the recliner and refuse to relinquish control for decades.
- Same as before, only now, he starts each morning by flinging last night's Depends in America's general direction.
- Head out to Gitmo for a little waterboard--, er SHUFFLEboarding!
- Shake his fist and scream at the entire state of Florida to get the hell off his front lawn.
and the Number 1 Fidel Castro Retirement Plan...
- Chuckle knowingly while listening to his Dead Kennedys CDs.
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Selected from 81 submissions from 29 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:
- Rex Meredith, Palm Springs, CA -- 1 (10th #1)
- Kim Moser, New York, NY -- 2, 7 Website / Hall of Famer
- Kevin Freels, Walnut Creek, CA -- 3, 14 Website / Hall of Famer
- Brad Osberg, Calgary, Canada -- 4
- Brad Hamer, Austin, TX -- 5
- Sandra Hull, Arlington, VA -- 6 Website / Hall of Famer
- Carl Knorr, Devo City, OH -- 7 Website / Hall of Famer
- Mark Weiss, Austin, TX -- 8 Hall of Famer
- Bruce W. Alter, Fairfax Station, VA -- 9
- Curtis Stoddard, Cedar Hills, UT -- 9, 13
- Larry Hollister, Concord, CA -- 10 Hall of Famer
- Trish Jensen, Reedsville, PA -- 11
- Joseph Moore, Concord, CA -- 12 Hall of Famer
- Chuck Sawyer, Rochester, NY -- 15
- Richard Skora, Columbus, OH -- 15
- Terry Ramsdell, Ann Arbor, MI -- 16
- Tristan Fabriani, Passaic, NJ -- Banner Tag
- Chris White, Los Angeles, CA -- List owner/editor Hall of Famer
- Billy Joel, Hicksville, Long Island, NY -- Ambience (explanation)
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© Copyright 1994-2008. All rights reserved.
TopFive.com and The Top 5 List are owned by Chris White.
Absolutely no publishing or reprinting without prior consent.
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