Comedies and dramas are a different story. Comedy, in particular, frequently hangs on the thinnest of cultural threads. But when a comic film takes off, the distributors will do everything possible to push it overseas. Take, for instance, "There's Something About Mary," one of the biggest and silliest movies of the year, starring Cameron Diaz. To foreign audiences, the title was mystifying. So 20th Century Fox renamed the movie country by country.

In Poland, blonde jokes are popular, so the title became, "For the Love of  a Blonde." In France, it was, "Mary at All Costs."

Scott Neeson, the executive in charge of foreign distribution at Fox, said Asians prefer literal titles. So in Thailand it became, "My True Love Will Stand All Outrageous Events." In Hong Kong it was called, "Enjoy Yourself  in the Game of Love."

That's poetic by the standards of Hong Kong, where the demand for literal descriptions has produced some jarring results. The Cantonese title for "Leaving Las Vegas" translates to "I'm Drunk and You're a Prostitute." "Field of Dreams" was "Imaginary Dead Baseball Players Live in My Cornfield." For truth in advertising, you could not beat the title for "The Crying Game" -- "Oh No! My Girlfriend Has a Penis!"

Occasionally, the Chinese seem to find unintended meanings in American  movies. "Interview With the Vampire," for instance, became, "So, You Are a Lawyer."  

But there's no arguing with the Chinese take on "Babe": "The Happy Dumpling-To-Be Who Talks and Solves Agricultural Problems." Or "My Best Friend's Wedding": "Help! My Pretend Boyfriend Is Gay." Or "George of the Jungle": "Big Dumb Monkey Man Keeps Whacking Tree With Genitals." Or even "Batman and Robin": "Come to My Cave and Wear this Rubber Codpiece, Cute Boy."

But still, there is that poetic side, as with the Pamela Anderson Lee vehicle called "Barb Wire." The Chinese saw it as "Delicate Orbs of Womanhood Bigger Than Your Head Can Hurt You."