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Good God! Jump back -- list myself!
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January 30, 2007
~~~ NOTE FROM CHRIS: ~~~
Academy Award nominations were last week.
Of course, as always, they left out a few...
The Top 16 Oscar Nominations We'd Like to See
- Best Off-Screen Performance by a Certifiable Nutjob:
Tom Cruise, Mel Gibson, Michael Richards
- Best Serif Font in a Subtitled Film:
Garamond, from "Letters From Iwo Jima"
- Best Show of Restraint in *Not* Making the Planned Sequel:
"Dukes of Hazzard II: Electric Boogaloo"
- Beating-a-Dead-Horse Lifetime Achievement Award:
Sylvester Stallone
- Outstanding Technical Merit for Casting a Wilson Brother in a Role in Which the Audience Felt No Urge to Beat the Talentless Bastard to Death With a Half-Empty Box of Goobers by Reel Two:
"Idiocracy"
- Most Prominent Golden Globes:
Pamela Anderson
- Best Bitch:
Meryl Streep for "The Devil Wears Prada," Judi Dench for "Notes on a Scandal" and Tara Reid
- Celebrity We'd Most Like to See Trip and Fall on His/Her Ass on the Red Carpet:
162-way tie
- Most Likely to Get That Damn Smirk Slapped Off His Face:
David Spade
- Best Musical We Didn't Want to Nominate for Best Picture 'Cause "Chicago" Won in 2002 and Musical Bios Were Recognized in "Ray" and "Walk the Line" and Enough Already With the Songs:
"Dreamgirls"
- Best Pitcher:
Nick Nolte's margaritas
- Whatever Happened to and Who Gives a Crap:
Steven Seagal and Melanie Griffith
- Best Name That Elicits Juvenile Giggling by Doubling as a Reference to Genitalia:
Peter O'Toole
- Best Supporting Supporter:
Roger Ebert's Girdle
- Best PowerPoint Presentation Masquerading as a Movie:
"An Inconvenient Truth"
and the Number 1 Oscar Nomination We'd Like to See...
- Best Re-Write of a Previous Script:
Karl Rove, Dick Cheney and George W. Bush for "The Surge"
Our ClubTop5 members get to see the
Runner Up and Honorable Mention items
for today's list, plus much MUCH more.
Join today!
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Selected from 91 submissions from 32 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:
- Ed Smith, Chattanooga, TN -- 1 (34th #1) Hall of Famer
- Allan Rousselle, Redmond, WA -- 2, 14
- Daniel Weckerly, Limerick, PA -- 3, 16 Hall of Famer
- Caryn Kennealy, Glendale, CA -- 4, Topic
- Donald Junter, New Haven, CT -- 5
- Terry Ramsdell, Ann Arbor, MI -- 5
- Andrew Hackard, Austin, TX -- 6
- Dave Wesley, Pleasant Hill, CA -- 7 Hall of Famer
- Dave Goudsward, Lake Worth, FL -- 8
- Brad Hamer, Austin, TX -- 9
- Danny Gallagher, McKinney, TX -- 10 Website
- Matt Kall, Solon, OH -- 11
- Carl Knorr, Devo City, OH -- 12, Banner Tag Website / Hall of Famer
- Michael Cunningham, Woodridge, IL -- 13
- Josh Sinnett, Bellingham, WA -- 13
- Steve Hurd, Oakland, CA -- 15 Hall of Famer
- David Zechiel, Lake Forest, CA -- 16
- Chris White, Los Angeles, CA -- List owner/editor Hall of Famer
- Adam West, Washington, DC -- Ambience (explanation)
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TopFive.com and The Top 5 List are owned by Chris White.
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