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Satisfaction Guaranteed or Your SexyBack
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August 16, 2007
~~~ NOTE FROM CHRIS: ~~~
In 1951, Fred Morrison began marketing a plastic flying
disc he called the "Pluto Platter." Six years later, he
sold the design to Wham-O, who renamed it the "Frisbee"
-- and it became one of the most popular toys ever.
Hmmm... what *other* products could benefit from renaming?
The Top 20 Proposed Product Renamings
- Starbucks -- Costsbucks
- Double Cheese 'n' Bacon Whopper -- BK Angioplasty
- Lawn Darts -- Kid Kabobs
- Hungryman Dinner -- Buffet in a Box
- Ford Excursion -- Ford Excessive
- SuperMaxx Condoms -- Wishful Thinking, Little Man!
- YouTube -- YouScrewedUpAndNowTheWholeWorldCanSeeItOnTheirTube
- Cell Phone -- Cinemus Interruptus
- Boca Burgers -- I Can't Believe It's Not Ground-Up Bull Groin!
- Windows Vista -- Microsoft Do_It-Yourself Doorstop Kit
- Big Mouth Billy Bass -- Redneck Detector 3000
- Silly Putty -- I Cannot Believe It Is Not Detonator Placement Medium Made Easily Available by Foolish Americans!
- Febreeze -- Stank-B-Gone
- Lamborghini Murcielago -- P-Magnet Twatcatcher
- GI Joe -- Gee, I Prevent Your Little Guy From Growing Up to Be a Metrosexual -- or WORSE!
- Red Bull -- Ritalinade
- Toyota Prius -- Toyota Smug Little Tree-Hugging Prick
- Doritos -- BongSnax
- Dunkin Donuts -- Morning Glory Holes
and the Number 1 Proposed Product Renaming...
- Flowbee -- Christ, My Hair Looks Like Shit!
Our ClubTop5 members get to see the
Runner Up and Honorable Mention items
for today's list, plus much MUCH more.
Join today!
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Selected from 93 submissions from 35 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:
- Mark D. Sabien, What Cheer, IA -- 1, 10 (47th #1/1st child!) Website / Hall of Famer
- Tom Stoudt, Fort Washington, PA -- 2 Hall of Famer
- Lori Petterson, Fairfax, VA -- 3
- L. A. Bettencourtt, Macon, GA -- 4
- Richard Skora, Columbus, OH -- 5
- Brandon Eldridge, St. Louis, MO -- 6
- Donald Junter, New Haven, CT -- 7
- Kim Moser, New York, NY -- 7 Hall of Famer
- Doug Finney, Houston, TX -- 8
- Larry Hollister, Concord, CA -- 9 Hall of Famer
- Yoram Puius, Boston, MA -- 11, 19
- Carl Knorr, Devo City, OH -- 12 Website / Hall of Famer
- Daniel Weckerly, Limerick, PA -- 13, 15 Hall of Famer
- Dave Wesley, Pleasant Hill, CA -- 14 Hall of Famer
- John Mozena, Grosse Pointe Woods, MI -- 16
- Andrew Hackard, Austin, TX -- 17
- Brad Osberg, Calgary, Canada -- 18
- Bruce W. Alter, Fairfax Station, VA -- 20
- Caryn Kennealy, Glendale, CA -- 20
- Tristan Fabriani, Passaic, NJ -- Banner Tag
- Chris White, Los Angeles, CA -- List owner/editor Hall of Famer
- Tony Goldmark, Chicago, IL -- Ambience (explanation)
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