================================================================== T H E T O P F I V E L I S T Warning: Do not put in fire -- may explode or leak. ================================================================== April 14, 2004 The Top 5 Personal Ads Placed by Animals 5> Bear: Single brown professional bear seeks female bear for companionship. Must share passion to keep fires out of the forest -- and *in* the bedroom. No smokers. 4> Mouse: Looking for a stable, stay-at-nest kinda guy. I don't give a rat's ass about looks. 3> Squirrel: Wild and crazy guy seeks soul mate for outdoor frolicking, al fresco dining and terrorizing blue-haired park interlopers. 2> Sloth: Looking for someone willing to take things slowly. and Topfive.com's Number 1 Personal Ad Placed by an Animal... 1> Dog: Who's a pretty girl? Who's a pretty girl?!? Is it you? *Is* it? Leave your reply on the oak outside 1432 Crestwood. Join ClubTop5 to see the whole list: http://www.topfive.com/html/clubtop5.shtml ================================================================== Rumination of the Day So who the hell gives a rat's ass about some moron publisher who rejects *my* children's book, but still prints Aesop's stupid-ass friggin' fables? But maybe that's just sour grapes. (Larry Hollister) To subscribe to Ruminations: ruminations-subscribe@topica.com ================================================================== Selected from 76 submissions from 34 contributors. Today's Top 5 List authors are: ------------------------------------------------------------------ Andrea Crain, Madison, WI -- 1 (2nd #1) Danny Gallagher, Austin, TX -- 2 Brad Simanek, Cedar Rapids, IA -- 3, Honorable Mention name Dave Goudsward, Lake Worth, FL -- 3 Mark Weiss, Austin, TX -- 4 Carl Knorr, Devo City, OH -- 5, Topic, RU list name Tristan Fabriani, Passaic, NJ -- Banner Tag Chris White, Los Angeles, CA -- List owner/editor Eric Burdon, Walker-on-Tyne, England -- Ambience Ambience explained: http://www.topfive.com/arcs_am/am041404.shtml ================================================================== [ T H E T O P F I V E L I S T ] [TOPFIVE -- The Web's Best Original Humor http://www.topfive.com] [----------------------------------------------------------------] The Top 5 List (original lists) top5-subscribe@topica.com Top5 Classic (greatest hits) top5classic-subscribe@topica.com Ruminations (odd thoughts) ruminations-subscribe@topica.com ================================================================== [ Copyright 2004 by Chris White All rights reserved. ] [ Do not forward, publish, broadcast, or use in any manner ] [ without crediting "The Top 5 List at www.topfive.com" ] ================================================================== [ To unsubscribe: Send mail to Top5-unsubscribe@topica.com ] [ To bitch at the owner: chris@topfive.com ] [ http://www.topfive.com ] ==================================================================