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June 18, 2008
~~~ NOTE FROM CHRIS: ~~~
You've probably heard by now that excessive rains
have caused much flooding in the midwest lately.
TopFive's own Brad Simanek reports that his office has
been completely ruined and until other arrangements
are made, he'll have no place to write Ruminations
while pretending to work. Check out Brad's pictures.
Fortunately, Brad was able to lift his house
and single-handedly move it to the top of a
nearby hill, so his family wasn't threatened.
Others weren't so lucky, and the Red Cross has
had to borrow money to get aid to flood victims.
If you'd like to make a donation, click here.
The Top 14 Signs You've Gotten Enough Rain
- "You wanted a houseboat? Well, now you got your F&%$IN' HOUSEBOAT, Slim!!"
- Al Gore's latest issue: Global squishing.
- You have every episode of "The Office" TiVo'd and a life-size poster of Dwight Schrute in your cubicle. (Oops! That a signs you've gotten enough *Rainn*.)
- Local birds are wearing snorkels.
- Even those wacky Biblical literalists are saying He's being a bit heavy-handed.
- FEMA calls to ask about the weather.
- Well, SOMEthing's not staying mainly on the plain in Spain.
- Katrina-Shmatrina. Try living through some *real water,* ya pansies.
- Myanmar sends you aid.
- The sign at the campsite entrance says that Smokey rates the current danger level of forest fires as "You Must Be Joking."
- Royal Caribbean offers a new luxury cruise package that includes Sioux City, Cedar Rapids and Des Moines.
- You drove your Chevy to the levee, and the levee was gone.
- The newspaper delivery guy doesn't even have to bother aiming for the puddles.
and the Number 1 Sign You've Gotten Enough Rain...
- While I'm busy picking crawdads out of Mrs. Simanek's hair, Kim Moser sneaks in and grabs my usual #1 spot.
Our ClubTop5 members get to see the
Runner Up and Honorable Mention items
for today's list, plus much MUCH more.
Join today!
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Selected from 92 submissions from 35 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:
- Kim Moser, New York, NY -- 1, 10 (37th #1) Website / Hall of Famer
- Russ Beland, Springfield, VA -- 2 (Rookie!)
- Brad Hamer, Austin, TX -- 3
- David Zechiel, Lake Forest, CA -- 4
- Tom Stoudt, Fort Washington, PA -- 5 Hall of Famer
- Bill Muse, Seattle, WA -- 6 Hall of Famer
- Lori Petterson, Fairfax, VA -- 7
- Emily Limbach, Boulder, CO -- 8
- Carl Knorr, Devo City, OH -- 9, 11 Website / Hall of Famer
- Michael Sheinbaum, Guilford, CT -- 12 Website
- Paul Wiley, Westtown, NY -- 12
- Daniel Weckerly, Limerick, PA -- 13 Hall of Famer
- Adela Branson, Soda Springs, ID -- 14
- Tristan Fabriani, Passaic, NJ -- Banner Tag
- Trish Jensen, Reedsville, PA -- List moderator
- Chris White, Los Angeles, CA -- List owner/editor Hall of Famer
- Creedence Clearwater Revival, El Cerrito, CA -- Ambience (explanation)
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© Copyright 1994-2008. All rights reserved.
TopFive.com and The Top 5 List are owned by Chris White.
Absolutely no publishing or reprinting without prior consent.
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