March 23, 2007
~~~ NOTE FROM CHRIS: ~~~
Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, the mastermind behind
the September 11 attacks, has admitted to
a slew of other terrorist acts, including
plotting to bomb London's Big Ben and to
assassinate American presidents and the Pope.
The Top 17 Terrorist Acts to Which
Khalid Sheikh Mohammed Has Admitted
- Painted sweat stains on the Statue of Liberty's armpit
- Green-lighted "Norbit"
- Tapped Rosie for "The View" and suggested she not be so shy
- Four words: Mr. Mister reunion tour
- Once used Donald Rumsfeld's toothbrush
- Financed Yoko Ono's recording career
- Left that burning paper bag at the White House front door last week
- Fathered Anna Nicole's baby
- Secretly replaced the "bomp" in the bomp-ba-bomp-ba-bomp with the "ram" from the rama-lama-ding-dong
- The shaving and de-pantying of Britney
- Provided arms to Video in ongoing battle against Radio Star
- Keeps voting for that wuss, Sanjaya
- Once sang a 20-minute rendition of "Feelings" at a karaoke bar in Kuwait City
- Came so very, very close to total nuclear devastation of the West Coast. Curse you, Jack Bauer!
- Writes thousands of angry letters to every newspaper that takes Marmaduke off of their comics page
- Left that friggin' cake out in the rain
and the Number 1 Terrorist Act to Which Khalid Sheikh Mohammed Has Admitted...
- Refused to clap, even though Tinkerbell's life was at stake
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Selected from 110 submissions from 43 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:
- Jennifer Ford, Chicago, IL -- 1 (4th #1) Website
- Dave Henry, Slidell, LA -- 2, 10 Hall of Famer
- Danny Gallagher, McKinney, TX -- 3, 8, 10 (Hat trick!) Website
- Andrew Hackard, Austin, TX -- 4
- Larry Hollister, Concord, CA -- 5 Hall of Famer
- Sandra Hull, Arlington, VA -- 6, 9 Website / Hall of Famer
- Brad Simanek, Cedar Rapids, IA -- 6 Website / Hall of Famer
- Dave Goudsward, Lake Worth, FL -- 7
- Tom Stoudt, Fort Washington, PA -- 8, 15 Hall of Famer
- Dawson Rambo, Santa Rosa, CA -- 8
- Jill Gallagher, Seattle, WA -- 10
- Dennis Koho, Keizer, OR -- 10 Website / Hall of Famer
- Brad Wilkerson, Mesa, AZ -- 10
- Paul Wiley, Westtown, NY -- 10
- Mark Weiss, Austin, TX -- 11 Hall of Famer
- Andy Krakowski, Alexandria, VA -- 12
- Caryn Kennealy, Glendale, CA -- 13, Banner Tag
- David G. Scott, Kansas City, MO -- 13 Website
- Curtis Stoddard, Cedar Hills, UT -- 14
- Scott Witmer, Hanover, PA -- 15
- Tristan Fabriani, Passaic, NJ -- 16
- Richard Skora, Columbus, OH -- 17
- Kristian Idol, Burbank, CA -- Topic Website
- Chris White, Los Angeles, CA -- List owner/editor Hall of Famer
- AC/DC, Sydney, Australia -- Ambience (explanation)
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