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Come in and relax in air-conditioned comfort!
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March 19, 2007
~~~ NOTE FROM CHRIS: ~~~
Here in the United States, an epidemic has left millions
unable to do much more than sit on the couch, eat chips
and drink beer. In other words, the NCAA college basketball
tournament, A.K.A. March Madness, is in full swing.
The Top 15 Things Overheard During March Madness
- "We're not supposed to call it that anymore; now it's March Mental Illness."
- "Who can I hate now that Duke and Bobby Knight are both out?"
- "These girls' games are pretty good. Too bad there's no women's pro basketball league they could play in."
- "Who would ever have imagined the phrase 'I'm a Winthrop alum' could get me laid?"
- "Get back to work? But sir, it's March!"
- "Your water broke? I'll get you another glass at the next time out."
- "Why don't they ever pass it to the white guy?"
- "Why don't you come back to my place and experience a little #1-seeding yourself?"
- "I'm sorry, I thought VCU was a social disease."
- "I swear, if one more person says, 'We don't need no stinkin' Wisconsin Badgers,' I'm gonna turn into a $7-beer-hurlin' FREAK!!"
- "Tickets start at $125, beer is $7 a cup and hot dogs are $4. This is amateur athletics at its finest!"
- "Check out the Gonzagas on that one!"
- "There's nothing like working 60+ hours on your brackets and then giving your hard-earned money to Bernice in Accounts Payable who made her picks based on numerology."
- "My team? Overrated.
My first-round loss? Unprecedented.
My bet-paying card? American Express."
and the Number 1 Thing Overheard During March Madness...
- "Men, I guess I should've explained: Just because we're a 'Cinderella team' doesn't mean we show up in formal gowns and glass slippers."
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Selected from 75 submissions from 31 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:
- Dave Wesley, Pleasant Hill, CA -- 1 (38th #1) Hall of Famer
- John Mozena, Grosse Pointe Woods, MI -- 2
- Richard Skora, Columbus, OH -- 3
- Paul Wiley, Westtown, NY -- 4, 11
- Michael Cunningham, Woodridge, IL -- 5
- Brad Simanek, Cedar Rapids, IA -- 6, 12 Website / Hall of Famer
- Dave Henry, Slidell, LA -- 7 Hall of Famer
- Brad Hamer, Austin, TX -- 8
- Lori Petterson, Fairfax, VA -- 9
- Mark Weiss, Austin, TX -- 10 Hall of Famer
- Andrew Hackard, Austin, TX -- 13
- Glenn Marcus, Washington, DC -- 14
- Bill Muse, Seattle, WA -- 15 Hall of Famer
- Donald Junter, New Haven, CT -- Topic
- Tristan Fabriani, Passaic, NJ -- Banner Tag
- Chris White, Los Angeles, CA -- List owner/editor Hall of Famer
- Madness, Camden, London, England -- Ambience (explanation)
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TopFive.com and The Top 5 List are owned by Chris White.
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