|
|
|
Ask us about our illegitimate grandchildren!
|
|
May 08, 2007
The Top 14 Things TopFive
Contributors Did During April
(Part II)
- Got a new "Livin' La Vida Loca" CD to replace the worn one.
- Using a poster of Rita Hayworth as camouflage, hand-dug an escape tunnel from the "contributors lounge."
- In lieu of money, sent the IRS autographed copies of "The TopFive Guide to Fudging on Your Taxes."
- Completed work on replica Princess Leia gold bikini for RealDoll "girlfriend."
- Streaked the "March of Dimes" walkathon.
- Tested my Alec Baldwin impression by leaving a nasty message for his daughter on Kim's machine.
- Shot the sheriff, the deputy, a traffic cop and a meter maid. Punched a hot-dog vendor for good measure.
- Wrote a few gags for Don Imus.
- Fed Al Gore some more global-warming statistics. That big doofus falls for everything, doesn't he?
- Sorted all my clothes based on thickness.
- Tied up all that cardboard and took it to the recyclers. Then chopped up the body, but really, wasn't it cool to take the cardboard to the recyclers?
- Sought spiritual wisdom from the Dalai Lama; mooned a bus full of nuns.
- Ran pool for when Heather Mills' leg would fall off during "Dancing With the Stars."
and the Number 1 Things TopFive Contributors Did During April...
- Made a new pen-pal with a widow who lives in Nigeria. She seems very nice, and get this: She's loaded!
Our ClubTop5 members get to see the
Runner Up and Honorable Mention items
for today's list, plus much MUCH more.
Join today!
|
Selected from 135 submissions from 48 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:
- David Zechiel, Lake Forest, CA -- 1 (2nd #1)
- Jill Gallagher, Seattle, WA -- 2
- Steve Hurd, Oakland, CA -- 3 Hall of Famer
- Travis Ruetenik, Hiroshima, Japan -- 4
- Terry Ramsdell, Ann Arbor, MI -- 5, 8
- Lori Petterson, Fairfax, VA -- 6
- Bill Muse, Seattle, WA -- 7 Hall of Famer
- Donald Junter, New Haven, CT -- 8
- Dave Henry, Slidell, LA -- 9 Hall of Famer
- Tom Stoudt, Fort Washington, PA -- 10 Hall of Famer
- John Mozena, Grosse Pointe Woods, MI -- 11, Topic
- Larry Hollister, Concord, CA -- 12 Hall of Famer
- Richard Skora, Columbus, OH -- 13
- Tristan Fabriani, Passaic, NJ -- 14, Banner Tag
- Brad Simanek, Cedar Rapids, IA -- Topic Website / Hall of Famer
- Dave Wesley, Pleasant Hill, CA -- Topic Hall of Famer
- Josh Sinnett, Bellingham, WA -- Topic
- Chris White, Los Angeles, CA -- List owner/editor Hall of Famer
- Golden Earring, the Netherlands -- Ambience (explanation)
|
|
|
|
|
|
© Copyright 1994-2008. All rights reserved.
TopFive.com and The Top 5 List are owned by Chris White.
Absolutely no publishing or reprinting without prior consent.
|
|
|
